Category Archives: disappointment

Tapping the Spine

In my mind I can not think of a spinal tap with out thinking of ouroboros. It not just that they are removing these primal fluids from your back, which I think of as akin to embryonic fluid, its that … Continue reading






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A Spectacularly Piss Poor Day

So last Monday I called my doctor. Yep that is all it took to make my day totally, utterly crap. He confirmed exactly what had been suspected: I do in fact have cancer. My journey to Laos the night before, … Continue reading






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The Big C?

Getting the News: In his Thai inflected English, he said, “it looks an feel cancer.” as he pinched the ping pong ball sized growth under my right arm. It hurt and brought tears to my eyes as he squeezed it. … Continue reading






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Remission, Just a Fools Game, part 3

Part 1 Part 2 After spending a whole day bemoaning the return of unwanted interbody hostilities, where I rejected even the most basic notion of getting out of bed, I used Friday to find some sort of escape for the … Continue reading






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Remission, Just a Fools Game, part 2

Part 1 Like being stuck watching an awful sequel to a movie that you never even wanted to see in the first place, my Lupus is back. I got the news late last Wednesday night. And after five days of … Continue reading






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Remission, Just a Fools Game, part 1

There is a song, that I am sure most of you have heard, by Bonnie Tyler called It’s a Heartache. I feel these lyrics infinitely capture my last week: “It’s a heartache/Nothing but a heartache/Hits you when it’s too late/Hits … Continue reading






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Rescuing a Heart Dismissed

One year ago today I met Gaby, the love of my life. We went to see the amazing film Orlando then walked clear across Manhattan talking, getting to know each other. As fates had it, we took the subway to … Continue reading






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Why Does India Want Me to Smell and Look like an Asshole?

Something horrible happened last week. It was a very, very terrible, sad day. I did something that I promised myself I would never, ever do. Yes, I bought a pair of Crocs — well an off brand that has no … Continue reading






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No More Street Food, No More Street Food…

I am not sure why I thought I could avoid the dreaded Indian food poisoning that befalls most travelers here. They say there is quite different flora & fauna in the water here that drastically can effect the digestive track. … Continue reading






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Disappointment, Part 2

So I have been quiet over here for a while. Mainly due to hitting a major snag in my departure plan. I failed to get the correct visa to travel to India in time for my already purchased flight. Yeah, … Continue reading






Posted in disappointment, travel | 4 Comments